Chapter 18

The next morning, Chew Ling came in a Comfort Cab. She was combing for something in her bag before she stepped into the canteen.

“See?” she took out a piece of paper. It was the size of a credit card with Zinc’s name and contact number on it. “Zinc’s name card.” she said proudly.

I did not tell her that I had one as well. I nodded and waited for the flag-raising. Chew Ling coughed twice, then one more time before she fled to the sink to spit. As usual, a few students turned their attention to her, mouth muttering with words like “that’s the sick Cedar” or “that nerdy girl is the one with SARS?”. Chew Ling coughed like she was going to die before spitting at least eight balls of phlegm from her throat. When she came back, she was wiping her nose with a tissue paper.

“Holy elephant, my lung is super productive.” she said and sat beside me.

I had gone off early yesterday evening when Chew Ling and Zinc seemed to hit it off well. When I went off, Chew Ling was still telling Zinc about the fluoride in toothpaste and Zinc seemed to be interested in every topic that Chew Ling incited.

“I went off at around five-thirty yesterday because I’ve got to go work. Zinc talks like a ten-year old kid.” Chew Ling was saying when I surveyed the canteen. “I told him a lot about me. I think he’s interested in me. Another typical guy who cannot resist my charms. The thing is, I didn’t even switch on my charms! Well, maybe my big knowledgeable brain is too hard to resist. How did you know him? Hey, you listening to me?”

“Let’s go sing a song and a rap.” I said and went towards the assembly area.

The students – I realized - ; they were looking at me. I turned to Chew Ling. Maybe they were looking at Chew Ling, but their eyes darted across at me.

I did not like that.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The next week, Chew Ling applied for a week’s off as she said she had a lung infection called pneumonia. According to her, on the phone, it is an illness of the lungs in which some “alveoli” in her lungs are inflamed. I had not understood a word from her. I just told her that I would tell the teacher about her medical leave. She said she might be off for either one week or two weeks, depending on the severity of her condition.

On the first morning of the day when Chew Ling was absent, I realized something: The gazes, the glances, the mutterings, the police and thief; they disappeared like how a cigarette smoke blended into the air.

So for the past few months, the students had not been looking at me; they had been looking at Chew Ling, the sick Cedar, the Cedar with SARS, that dying Cedar.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

For a Junior College student in Singapore, the first word that comes to his or her mind on the academic terms will usually be ‘A’ Levels and then Project Work. ‘A’ Levels is the final examination that final year students have to take in order to progress to university; whereas, Project Work is a project that students have to do throughout their first year.

During our PW lesson, Miss Choo wanted to split us into our PW groups. “We’ll draw lots. I don’t want you to group together with your close friends because in reality, you don’t get to choose who you will be working with.” Miss Choo said. “Who is absent today?”

“Chew Ling.” Sian Min, the second most talkative girl in the class, said.

“Okay. There are twenty students in this class. I’m going to split you students into groups of four. The last group with only four students will group with Chew Ling.”

Whisperings raised and lowered.

Miss Choo took out a piece of A4 paper, tore it into twenty pieces and wrote the letters A to D. She then clumped the small papers into little balls and tossed all of them into a cup.

“Students who got the same letter will be in the same group.”

Miss Choo walked around the classroom as we picked the paper from the cup. It all felt like a kid trying to play some stupid game. I got a “C”. When we all had our letters, Miss Choo called all the students who got an “A” to stand up. Keng Chin, Ming Zhi, Wendy, Sian Min and Kenneth raised their hands.

“Group A!”

When Miss Choo announced that, Keng Chin muttered a soft cheer. Everyone in the class knew he had a crush on Sian Min. Christ, Eugene, Andy, Jing Lin and Joe were in group B.

“Now to group C. Who got C?”

I raised my hand slowly. I sat right at the back of the classroom and had a perfect view of who had just raised their hands. Pat, the girl who could have occupied two seats in the MRT train, jolted her hand up and looked around. She had over-baked orangey skin with an explosive hair style that would need rebonding. When she saw me, she flashed me a delightful smile. Shi Yun raised her hand up as well, twisting her neck.

On the very right corner, someone else raised up her hand at a right angle. A ray of sunlight reflected off her watch, landing near Miss Choo.

I understood how Chew Ling had felt during her asthma attack then; breathlessness, struggling for air like oxygen had been devoid in the atmosphere and the world seems unbelievably unbelievable.

“No one else?” Miss Choo said. No one said anything. “That means Chew Ling is in this group.”

“Oh, great.” Serene said, lowered her hand and glared at me. “Absolutely great.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Fifteen minutes later, we were seated together in our group, trying to discuss what topic to do for our Project Work.

“Wah lao, we same group as sick Cedar, leh. Sianz half!” Pat was saying when we arranged our chairs.
Around us, students were pushing chairs, telling jokes that only the girls laughed. Miss Choo was reading something at her table. Everyone seemed to be happy; save for our group.

“I think she going to spread some t-virus to us, liao lar.” Pat continued. She is usually quiet in lectures and talkative in tutorials. “Die liao. Oei!”

Serene rested her elbow on the table, cleared her throat and gave me a smile. Every smile from her looked contemptuous. “Well, our friend here must be very happy. The sick Cedar is her very, very good friend, you know. It’s a very popular culture in those girls’ school; girl-like-girl thingy. Shih Tzu must have discovered her hidden expertise here. She prefers a hole rather than a banana.”

I arrowed my eyes at Serene. In the background, someone was suggesting doing a topic on buying movie tickets with Ez-Link. A girl, Jing Lin, was suggesting using GTM, the machine found in MRT Stations. I lowered my eyebrows and all of sudden, all I could hear was my voice and nothing else.
“I don’t want to be in the same group as Chew Ling too.” I said. Maybe it was too loud; some of the students and Miss Choo had turned their eyes on me. “Look, I don’t want to be in the same group as the sick Cedar as well, okay? You hear me? And we’re not lesbians. We don’t fuck each other.”

A silence gripped the classroom for a few seconds. One of the students sneezed, another coughed and the talking resumed like a wave.

“Oh, what a surprise. Shih Tzu had broken up with sick Cedar. And please fucking define fuck.”

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